sapphicsophos:

dustsculptures:

dustsculptures:

“no one’s ever mad at me unless they tell me so” is the best assumption i’ve ever made

sorry for tagwatching but you still have to act like they aren’t mad at you imo! bc it’s the mad person’s duty to make it known if they want anything changed. it is never anyone’s duty to be a mind reader.

Also, on that note, if you are mad at someone and don’t tell them, you also cannot expect them to know or do anything about it. Just like you cannot be expected to be a mind reader with other people, they cannot be expected to read your mind.

And like, sometimes that’s fine! I definitely don’t tell people I am mad at them if there’s nothing constructive that will come of it! It’s just also important to keep in mind because if you are hoping for a resolution, it can’t happen unless you let the other person know what’s up.

firstfullmoon:

ALT

Jonathan Wells, “April Morning”

seeveekat:

anyataylorjoys:

The Watermelon Woman (1996) dir. Cheryl Dunye

Hey this movie is really important in queer history! It was the first feature length film directed by a black lesbian!

You can watch it here for free!

I really recommend you do because while it is a rom-com (and a drama), it also looks at how the stories of black queers are over looked in history.

yen-sids-tournament:

Squirrel Girl v Baymax - Round 1

Which Hero Would You Call On To Save The Day?

Squirrel Girl

Baymax

Squirrel Girl

Name: Doreen Green
Power: Tail, Strength, Healing, Night Vision
Story: Unbeatable Squirrel Girl/Marvel Rising: Secret Warriors

Baymax

Name: Baymax
Power: Medical Care, Suit. Programing
Story: Big Hero 6 et al.

slfcare:

five recipes for an exciting life (in my opinion)

1. spending enough time creating things with your hands (baking, drawing, scrapbooking, doodling, crocheting, journaling and so on)
2. keeping track of things like pretty skies, milestones, happy memories, appointments you’re looking forward to
3. listening to music that genuinely makes you feel happy and energetic
4. making a habit of reaching out to people in a way that’s comfortable to you (i send my dad songs he might like, my friend sends me monthly life updates)
5. being kind to all your five senses → like investing in a scented candle or essential oil dispenser or body mist, having a soft blanket or socks (or a soft animal to pet), listening to birdsong or the rain, looking at the sky more often, and having your favorite foods enough times

naamahdarling:

sammysdewysensitiveeyes:

pro-anomalocaris:

myfandomrealitea:

I am actually begging some people to just let some spaces exist untouched by real-world issues and horrors.

Like I’ve lost count of the amount of times peaceful game or fandom servers have been ruined by people stampeding in with political rants, bitching about world issues, demanding internal activism, demanding vent channels so they can whine about their shitty parents, ect.

Like. Respectfully. Not every single space has to be inclusive of and welcoming of outside topics. The real world sucks. We don’t needed to be reminded of that absolutely everywhere.

Psychologists have talked about this extensively. In order to repair the damage caused by the stressors of life, your brain needs to have down time in which it is not being stressed. It needs to be able to turn off sometimes and turn down during others. That’s how your brain processes stress enough to regulate cortisol production and let you get through whatever it is without being on-edge the entire time, all of the time.

At some point we will, as a society, have to unlearn this idea that if you’re ever caught not thinking about something serious, you must not give a shit about others. Your mind is not designed to constantly be stressed.

Your body also isn’t, btw - prolonged stress without breaks is linked to all kinds of cardiac problems.

Not only will it not kill you to let the Pokemon Unite server or Naruto/Sasuke server just be about Pokemon Unite or NaruSasu, it would actually benefit you to do so.

If you won’t let a place be peaceful for someone else’s sake, at least do it for your own.

My “hot take” of the day is that “Don’t you dare look away!” is the younger generation’s version of “Finish your dinner, children are starving in (poor third-world country).”

I understand the sentiment, there are atrocities happening across the world, and it is horrible, and we all want to DO something about it. I don’t think you are wrong to feel that way or to try to help however you can. But feeding yourself a constant diet of graphic images and descriptions of these atrocities and writhing around in agonized guilt and sadness and anger doesn’t actually help the people who are suffering, any more than kids stuffing themselves to clean their plates puts food in the mouths of people who are starving. If you want to help then by all means find a some concrete way to do, but also step back. Making yourself miserable 24/7 because of the bad things happening in the world will not help anyone.

I felt differently about this at one point, then started having climate/world events-related panic attacks and realized that the constant barrage of doomsaying and hopelessness was actually TREMENDOUSLY harmful to me psychologically. I realized I could be informed but not overwhelmed, that I could care and act according to that caring without constantly being reminded of every bad thing happening in every corner of the globe. Filtering what I see and engage with has not made things worse for the world, it only means I have somewhat fewer panic attacks now.

pro-anomalocaris:

genderkoolaid:

part of the reason i love how bell hooks talks about masculinity is that she shows real compassion towards men suffering from the effects of toxic masculinity. she was conscious of how we need to unlearn the ways we talk about men + masculinity just as much as we need to unlearn the same for women + femininity. so many times ill see someone talking about toxic masculinity like (hyperbolizing here but only slightly) “these FUCKING STUPID BABY BITCHES won’t MAN UP and go to a therapist!!!” and like. i get the anger. but you see feminists recreating patriarchal manhood by only promoting good behaviors through patriarchal frameworks. any use of the term “real men” is bad because it reifies the idea that manhood is a special title you must earn, and it is something possible to fail and fake. & as important as it is to promote sexual equality + the pleasure of non-cis-men, lots of people are essentially still working with the idea that men need sexual prowess to have worth but just shifting it slightly so there is more emphasis on women’s pleasure. but I want cis men to think about their partners’ pleasure because they care about their partners, not because they need to check a box in order to keep their man card. and don’t get me started on small dick jokes– and the absolutely pitiful excuse people will use that “well, I don’t believe it, but misogynistic men get upset when I say it, so it’s okay!”

basically bell hooks is so fucking right. in order to create loving men we need to love men, simply for being alive, whether or not they are performing. as much as we need to actively unlearn misogyny (and we do), it’s equally vital we unlearn patriarchal ways of seeing manhood. we can’t just assume that taking a feminist perspective automatically means there is no work to be done there.

My mom is a psychologist and she has gotten dudes to go to therapy just by telling them softly, one hand gently resting on their arm, “You deserve to go to therapy. You deserve to have someone help you and you deserve to feel better than this. You shouldn’t have to go through so much alone.”

When I tell you she’s made men cry with this, I mean it. I have never seen anyone get a man to go to therapy by making it another task they have to do in order to be a Real Man ™. I have seen full grown badass, shredded truckers and professional businessman and toughened good ole boys get teary eyed or freeze or cry silently when shown an ounce of compassion because men are starving for it. Men are so used to everything being yet another burden to carry and thing to do in order to earn manliness points in the eyes of the world that being told sincerely, “you deserve to be happy” just about short-circuits most of us. One time one of my bullies’ dads went from yelling at my mom to trying not to cry because she just listened to him rant about how stretched thin he was being a single dad, put a hand on his and said, “That sounds like a lot to carry alone. I can’t imagine how hard that’s been.” It was like she’d flipped a switch and suddenly he had permission to feel what the anger was disguising. (She then told my bully to try to think about his dad a bit more, because family needs family. And when I tell you this boy looked like he’d been called out by God Himself, I mean it; he had several revelations and stopped a lot of toxic behavior after that.)

I really hope this isn’t derailing with personal anecdotes but I just. I really think it’s baffling how tumblr will post all these quotes about kindness, compassion and love and then not extend them towards men. I just don’t get it. Because men react to any of it extended towards them like someone in the desert presented suddenly with water.

One of my neighbors is known as the grumpy old guy who hates everyone. He is not grumpy or hateful towards me because I did the very Southern thing of making food for everyone and introducing myself when I moved in. I listened to him rant about how no one does that these days and how no one knows their neighbors and agreed that that’s awful and we all need people and it sucks that we’re all so isolated from each other. I told him it’s cool that he still does stuff like foster cats and didn’t let the world drain the kindness from him and y'all, that one tiny piece of acknowledgment that life is hard and his kindness in spite of it took work has made the “grumpy old guy who hates everyone” my bestie. He and I chat whenever we see each other in the hall. He is starving for positivity and gentleness.

One time on the bus, coming home from shopping, I got to talking to a guy in his 50’s riding across from me. He wanted to know why I had a bunch of flowers. Snidely, he asked if I was giving them to my boyfriend. (I had on a vest with Pride pins at the time.) I explained actually, they were for my French professor, whose mother had died. He was confused that I said my professor was male. Nobody gave him flowers when his mom died a year ago, he said. I took a flower out of the arrangement and handed it to him as my stop approached. He looked at it as if I’d given him an entire flower store.

A chunk of the internet seems convinced that the way to stop hateful men is to meet hate with hate. I have yet to see that work. I have yet to even hear anecdotes that state that it works, only that it satisfies some internal desire to lash out in response to someone lashing out at you.

But I have seen a construction worker on a bus hold a single white hyacinth with the utmost care and be unable to meet my eyes as he said “thank you”.

sixteenseveredhands:

2,300-Year-Old Plush Bird from the Altai Mountains of Siberia (c.400-300 BCE): crafted with a felt body and reindeer-fur stuffing, all of which remains intact

This artifact was sealed within the frozen barrows of Pazyryk, Siberia, for more than two millennia, where a unique microclimate enabled it to be preserved. The permafrost ice lense formation that runs below the barrows provided an insulating layer, preventing the soil from heating during the summer and allowing it to quickly freeze during the winter; these conditions produced a separate microclimate within the stone walls of the barrows themselves, thereby aiding in the preservation of the artifacts inside.

This is just one of the many well-preserved artifacts that have been found at Pazyryk. These artifacts are attributed to the Scythian/Altaic cultures.

Currently housed at the Hermitage Museum.

houseofgeeks:

gay-jesus-probably:

schakira:

travalicious:

travalicious:

why is this the hottest thing i’ve ever seen

HE SHOWED UP WITH A DUEL DISK TODAY?????

AND ALL FIVE EXODIA PIECES

I need everyone to know that I looked it up, and Noah Lyles is doing this as part of an ongoing bet he has with shotput competitor Chase Jackson. She’s wearing Naruto accessories every day, and if Lyles whips out Yugioh cards at every race, then for the shotput finals Jackson will re-enact the scene of Rock Lee dropping his weights.

This is now the only part of the Olympics that I care about.

Update. Chase Jackson followed through. (And also secured her spot to the Olympics with a first place throw of 20.10 m).

inkflowergarden:

Sailing back home on the stream of stars…